When folks hear that I’m planning to travel alone to a foreign country, they typically ask one or both of the following questions:
1. Aren’t you scared?
2. What will you do all by yourself?
My answer to the first question is simply, “No.” I rarely feel the need to elaborate because I don’t think I could explain why I am not scared to someone who would think to ask the question. I’m not criticizing the question – I get it. I understand why some people, especially people who have not traveled alone, would think of it as frightening. The reason why I am not scared is difficult to explain because it is so much a part of who I am. I have been traveling in foreign countries over half my life, and most of those trips have been either solo or with one other person.
Only once, when I was fifteen years old, did I travel with a group. It was my first time overseas and I went with a group of about twenty students from around the US on a 3-week tour of the Mediterranean. I enjoyed the tour immensely, but even then my favorite moments were those precious hours of “free time” where I was free to explore a city by myself. It seemed magical, disappearing in a crowd of locals, essentially invisible and free to watch people without them noticing that I was a stranger in a foreign land. Once, when I had wandered off during free time in Rome, I came upon a crowd of people lining up outside a beautiful church. They seemed excited, so I jumped in the line with them, having absolutely no idea what we were lining up for.
Suddenly, the doors of the church opened and the most elegant and fashionably dressed woman emerged with a group of people also dressed in gorgeous dresses and suits. The people in the line cheered as the woman and her entourage proceeded down the line, shaking hands with the people. When she reached me, I stuck out my hand and smiled. She smiled gently, gracefully, and took my hand in hers. I shivered when I felt her soft skin – her hands were as smooth as a newborn child’s – these were the hands of a woman who had never washed clothes, done the dishes, scrubbed a bathroom floor. “Who is she?” I wondered, “And who are the people following her, also shaking my hand and smiling?” They couldn’t be movie stars – I would have recognized them, and there would be a bigger crowd forming. As they drove away, I wondered whether I would ever find out the answer to those questions.
Later that day, when I returned to the tour group, our guide made an exciting announcement: “The Queen of Spain was here in Rome today, visiting a church with the princess and her fiance. You can see her on the television!”
I had shaken hands with Queen Sofia of Spain.
Would this have happened if I had been traveling with the group? Probably not. If I had been traveling with another person? Perhaps, depending on whether that person was willing to stand in a line that was not moving for half an hour for no apparent reason. You see, when you are alone, you make all the decisions. That brings me to my usual response to the second question.
What do I do when I’m traveling alone?
Answer: Whatever I want.
***
Side Note: I also shook hands with Princess Cristina and her fiance, Olympic athlete Inaki Urdangarin, who married about a year later in Barcelona.
Some of the best moments of my life have been those spent with Nancy. Both of us feel like that trip in particular was a life-changing experience. A few years later, we returned to Europe to study abroad - I spent the year in Besancon, France and Nancy studied in Salamanca, Spain, but we managed to find several opportunities to travel together that year as well.
Suddenly, the doors of the church opened and the most elegant and fashionably dressed woman emerged with a group of people also dressed in gorgeous dresses and suits. The people in the line cheered as the woman and her entourage proceeded down the line, shaking hands with the people. When she reached me, I stuck out my hand and smiled. She smiled gently, gracefully, and took my hand in hers. I shivered when I felt her soft skin – her hands were as smooth as a newborn child’s – these were the hands of a woman who had never washed clothes, done the dishes, scrubbed a bathroom floor. “Who is she?” I wondered, “And who are the people following her, also shaking my hand and smiling?” They couldn’t be movie stars – I would have recognized them, and there would be a bigger crowd forming. As they drove away, I wondered whether I would ever find out the answer to those questions.
Later that day, when I returned to the tour group, our guide made an exciting announcement: “The Queen of Spain was here in Rome today, visiting a church with the princess and her fiance. You can see her on the television!”
I had shaken hands with Queen Sofia of Spain.
Would this have happened if I had been traveling with the group? Probably not. If I had been traveling with another person? Perhaps, depending on whether that person was willing to stand in a line that was not moving for half an hour for no apparent reason. You see, when you are alone, you make all the decisions. That brings me to my usual response to the second question.
What do I do when I’m traveling alone?
Answer: Whatever I want.
***
Side Note: I also shook hands with Princess Cristina and her fiance, Olympic athlete Inaki Urdangarin, who married about a year later in Barcelona.
***
Another Side Note: Admittedly, there is one person who I enjoy traveling with just as much as I enjoy traveling alone - perhaps more - my bestie Nancy Rhinehart DeVetter. Here we are on our two-month backpacking trip around Europe after we graduated from high school in 1999:
Some of the best moments of my life have been those spent with Nancy. Both of us feel like that trip in particular was a life-changing experience. A few years later, we returned to Europe to study abroad - I spent the year in Besancon, France and Nancy studied in Salamanca, Spain, but we managed to find several opportunities to travel together that year as well.
Right before I left for this trip to India and Sri Lanka, I received a package in the mail from Nancy: a USB drive with a collection of songs about traveling and enjoying life. I often feel like Nancy is with me when I venture out into the world.
